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Not a good day so far

on November 11, 2009 - 5:24am

Nice day if you are a duck or some other water lovin creature. This stupid storm is working on my last nerve. Got to work after stopping at the store for a couple things without incident. I get to work and the Wrath of God descended upon me. I got slammed by what felt like a 35MPH wind gust, my umbrella went to pieces and I nearly hit the ground. So now my feet are soaked, my hair is a mess and I don't even want to discuss the state of my makeup. Sheesh.

Had a good Al Anon meeting last night though on Balance. For an Adult Child of an Alcoholic like me, who was told at the tender age of twelve that its her responsibility to keep the family together, balance is not something easy to come by. And we are not talking about the kind of balance a gymnast needs to perform on the Beam. Its the balance between maturity in social situations and the temper and thought processes of an immature child. Not easy to maintain.
I'm hoping the day will go better.

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Well just my luck

on November 10, 2009 - 6:08am

I would pick today to wear my new contacts. A day of bigtime wind and rain. Anyone who wears contact lenses knows of what I speak. The eensyest bit of dust or grain of sand burns like the eternal flames of hell.

Otherwise things are the usual for me for this time of year. Homesickness for my family and no money or means to move closer. Soon I'll be busy with the Columbia Childrens Theatre and that will help ease the mood.

Since Josh thinks of us as a bunch of "wild hooligans" I'll post here that I'm stepping out of my comfort zone on Friday and getting dressed up for an evening of Dancing and Dinner at an event sponsored by my new Church. It takes a lot for me to do this kind of thing alone. So I guess this would fall under the "wild hooligan" in me huh Josh?? To put on a black velvet minidress, pearls and diamonds, and go to the Marriott Ballroom for an evening of mixing, mingling, dining and dance. I think I need more of a life!! :D

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Journal time!

on November 9, 2009 - 10:58am

Wow its been so long. Lots have happened since my last entry. Things have changed so much. I left All Saints Episcopal Church and have joined Good Shepherd Episcopal (full name is Episcopal Church of the Good Shepherd but thats just too long) because people at All Saints decided its okay to Censor the Old Testament. Its not okay. Not in my book. So I, and several others, left for other Churches. I'm very happy with Good Shepherd. Its a 100 year old Church with old fashioned creaky wooden pews and lots of history. This Friday I'm actually going to a Church sponsored Dinner/Dance so I can meet more of the parish and get more comfortable with them.
Thats about it, except I'm in the market for a new laptop. My poor old Toshiba is on life support and it scares me every time I turn it on. Whether I'll have a normal startup or if it'll start up, get to the start page, and then shut itself down again. Gotta save my pennies for that.

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on May 18, 2009 - 11:15am

So I've been mulling over it, worrying over it, thinking on it and finally I did it. I applied to a small community college's Paralegal Program and I GOT IN!! I've got some phone calls to make as I have my transcripts from my Alma Mater that they might need to determine just where I fit in to the SIXTY CREDIT HOURS I'll be facing come January. Its past time for me to get my act together and improve my life. Yes I'm faced with a daunting task and a long road ahead but the reward is sweet. Paralegals do pretty well financially and I'll just be in a better position for life. Why am I doing this now? Well I've just got to. God planted the seed and so far its growing just fine. Of course I plan on going to a concert or two, or three (Hee hee!!) as I'm sure my little brain will be needing the break from classes entitled "TORTS 322" and of course going to see Josh will be just the break I need. I'm shelving dating for now. Its time.... for me. For me to learn just who I am, and what I'm really made of. Its time for me to love myself. For loving oneself is the key to loving and being loved by another, yes?? So for the next eight months I'll be preparing to re-enter the classroom, seeing where my road takes me. And if in the crazyness of the life I'm about to have I find someone wonderful, then so be it.
So here's to... me. To my reclaiming my life and my identity on my own.
Love you all!!

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on April 14, 2009 - 10:02am

So I went to see a friend of mine yesterday. She called me a-beggin for some gas money so I headed over there. It was nice to sit with her. She's a Social Worker and a Bereavement Counselor and an all around lovely woman. So I tell her about Mr. Nutso I mentioned in my previous entry. Her eyes got wide and she sat up and said "Borderline with Bi-Polar!!" And she was exactly right!! Borderline Personality Disorder is more a female issue but its not exclusive to males. Men with Borderline can be dangerous. But we sat there and as I told her some of the things he'd done and said and described some of his behaviors, she grew more insistent. She was also immensely glad to hear that I'd told him that I no longer wanted to see him. She knows her stuff. After all, my mother was one of her instructors. Anyway, talk about crazy!!
In lieu of this development, I think I'll be stepping back from eHarmony. For a while at least. So far this is two attempts and two no ways. I'm not sure I'm up for a third. Whew. Perhaps I need to settle myself more before I resume this madness called life. I'm not sure.
Thanks everyone who warned me to run. I did!! And thank God, you know?? Its great to know there's support here. It means a lot.
Okay back to work. Love to all!!



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