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on October 30, 2007 - 3:20pm

I won't be on for a week. For some reason I felt the need to mention that here. See you all next Wed! :P

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More dancing!

on October 29, 2007 - 6:01pm

One of my favorite childhood movies is on, Casper! I used to be in love with Devon Sawa. Haha. This movie would make me cry though.

Last night I went out with "jack", my best friend (who hung up on me today, actually...), and a girl we just met. We went to hear this band at a local cafe. It turned out I knew the guitarist. How ironic!

The music was kinda crazy. There were three bands. The first was just this guy singing in his pj's, making up words, strumming the ukulele. Next was the band with the guy I knew from church, and third, was a band with more, um, normal music. Near the end, Jack said he thought he could swing to the song they were playing. I agreed that could work, so he held out his hand, and we danced! We were the only ones in the whole place dancing! It was awesome! I thought that was their last song so I sat down again. My friend took pics of us :)

Wish I had other fun things to talk about. Work is improving! I finished all mine so I just helped someone else all day. That was a nice change because I could take my time doing it since it wasn't my work.

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Why Boys Don't Dance

on October 26, 2007 - 7:19pm

In our conversation today I complained that not enough guys like to dance. He said, "The problem isn't that guys don't like to dance. I said, "then why don't they?" He said, "it's not the dancing they don't like I mean, c'mon, what guy wouldn't want to dance?" He paused before dance, and I'm not sure if it was his stutter, or if there was something else he had in mind but didn't want to say. Something like "what guy wouldn't want to be with a girl?" Haha. Anyway, he said their problem is with taking dance lessons, which they probably don't think is "manly." I told him that makes it more manly. He laughed. So boys don't dance because they don't think it's manly, and real men dance because it is manly. Thus concludes my story.

PS That means you should dance, Josh. It's manly and you get to be with girls ;)

Oh one the that I realized last Sunday was how much dancing reflects relationships. For example, I put my hand on one guy's shoulder, and he told me to move it to his upper chest, just under his shoulder. He said that way I could push him away if I needed to, if he got to close. Later "jack" said something about the guys leading the girls and we had to just follow their lead. Then he said something about the girls can always leave if we don't like what the guy's doing.

I'd never danced with a guy who actually leads, and it is a strange feeling, not having any control over what I'm doing next. If he decides to spin me, I spin; if he thinks we should do the chase, we do the chase. I don't know what move I'll be doing until I'm doing it, and have to trust him completely. I can see why dancing is so romantic. It's way more than the fact that you're touching someone of the opposite sex. It reflects what's going on between both of you.

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Oh, to be dancing!

on October 26, 2007 - 5:50pm

I wish I was dancing right now. I called "jack" and asked him where he goes dancing. I'm so eager to dance again, I can't stand it! I think I've danced so much lately, that my body doesn't feel right when it's not dancing. Early on in our conversation we talked in general about "guys who dance," and he asked, "So, do you have one?" I said, "a guy who dances?" He said, "yeah." I said, "No, sadly I do not." He said, "Oh!"
He gave me lots of info, and said he'd call me next time he goes to this one particular dance place. Next time they do the tango he'll call me, and he's probably going to have another party at his house which he'll call me about. I told him to come to the Christmas production, and when he found out the price, he started talking about giving tix to his family as presents. I told him to call me and tell me which show he's coming to. So I still don't have a set time of when I'll see him again, and based on the info he have me, dancing this weekend's out.

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Ramblings

on October 25, 2007 - 8:02pm

Haven't heard from "Jack" today. I do hope he works up the nerve to call or text me. Perhaps he'll invite me to the next dance party, when ever that is. His mom really seemed to like me (ha, and she did drive to my house to return my coat). His mom made a comment I found interesting. I told her I absolutely love dancing, and she said, "Good! 'Jack' does to. His whole life revolves around dance." She could have mentioned him because he was the reason I was there. It seemed though that she was implying something more...

Work today was much better! My boss complimented me! He said that I couldn't be doing a better job, and he's incredibly happy with the job I'm doing. He said that other people get frustrated with me because they don't understand what I've had to deal with, but he knows, and he can't believe I've been able to keep up with everything this well :) Totally made my day. I told a coworker, and she said, "He knows he ticked you off and he'd better make up for it. The only time you get a compliment is when he's made you mad, no matter how much you deserve credit." Too true. Hopefully he did realize I don't appreciate being yelled at for crazy things all the time.

Then this guy at work took my picture. He took only two other pics of coworkers, and I know this guy "likes" me, so I think he took the other pics just so he wasn't too obviously just taking mine. I can see right through that scheme, though ;) Haha I asked to see the pictures, and he grabbed the camera, exclaimed, "no! don't touch it!" and ran off. I wonder why? Guys sure are interesting!

Tonight we had our first monk rehearsal. It actually went quite well. I was concerned at first, but we already seem to have a clue as to what we're doing. The lady in charge even said it was a good thing I was there :)

I'm still learning to trust God with my relationships. He's been working with me! All my life I've seriously considered not having children of my own, but God's changed my desires. I've always wanted a husband, but now I yearn for one more than ever.

Josh's Christmas album actually brought all this out. I can't listen to I'll Be Home For Christmas because it makes me want a husband and kids, which makes me sad.

I watched Josh singing "She's Out of My Life" in Manila, thanks to youtube. The line about being together for 2 years always grabs my attention. It took me 5 to figure out one guy wasn't the right one, and a lot of people now are getting married after dating only months. Then again I know lots of stories of married people who dated the people they married for a few years, all the while thinking that person was not the one. So I guess one really never knows. It's a good thing God's in control and not me!

I wish I was tired but when I'm wanting someone, I can't sleep...

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