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Love in the fast lane

judymcdermott's picture
on August 6, 2010 - 3:10am

On June 6 I had a blind first date. We had fun. He took me to Carrabbas. I'd never had the pleasure of dining there before so it was nice.
Fast forward to today, our two month anniversary. He has two children, ages 14 and 12, and tomorrow I meet them for the first time. They want to meet me and have expressed their readiness to their father. I should mention their mother died when they were 3 and 5 years old. This is a big gigantic huge deal for me, as I never saw myself getting attached to a man with kids. I love kids, but due to the forces of nature being out of my control, I am infertile and had really just settled down to living alone with no one, or hopefully meeting someone wholly unattached and falling in love. Now here is this endearing, sweet, intelligent man who loves me dearly and I am falling for him and he has TEENAGERS. Oh and there's something else. In December when I get on a plane to see my family for Christmas, they are coming with me. My mother is ecstatic. I'm not quite there yet.
I feel like I've been put on a runaway train with no brakes. The thought that he might propose marriage over Christmas makes me nauseous. I love him! I do. I'm just not quite where he is, if you know what I mean?? On Wednesday he came over to spend time with me and he'd brought me a gift. It was something I had been pining for for years. Its the entire "Anne of Green Gables" series. All eight books are finally under my roof. I was shocked and touched all at the same time.
I wish I knew how to catch up to him. I've asked him to slow down, but he can't seem to, and no words I say seem to get through to him that I'm feeling rushed and scared. Help!!!
Thanks for reading.

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