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Special Times

jlbrown3711's picture
on November 20, 2006 - 9:26am

It is cold, wet, and very dark here this morning in Gustine. Two of the three kids are off to school already and son is still sleeping and so I find myself a bit of quiet time to think and get in a blog before I start my day.My spouse is going to be out of town tonight, so I will probably find myself on the boards longer tonight. I don't know why, but when he is gone I tend to be up later than I normally am. I am not sure why that is. I guess a part of me feels guily if I spend any time on the computer when he is home. So, a day to play, chat, wrirte, or just whatever. I almost look forward to these days. I know that sounds bad, but really, its the only time I am not afraid to be who I am. I don't feel tension, or worried about anything I do. I know, a marriage is pretty troubled when someone feels like that. If anything, it gives me time to think about everything without feeling pressure to talk about it. Maybe someday I will discover why I really am struggiling with this. There will be a time that has answers......

Anyway, back to the weather. I so love when it rains, It isn't raining now, but it did most of the night. The dampness of the grass, the crispness of the air, are all still very strong on my senses. It is quite relaxing actually. It is times like these that if I play a song like AWAKE by Mr Groban, I would most likely be very emotional. It is amazing how a bit of weather, and a song can actually compliment each other. Not that the song reminds me of raining, but the fact it can bring reflection to my thoughts. Both weather and Great songs can do that for me. Combine them and well, sometimes it is hard to control. I am not really in the mood for a good cry today, so I won't do that right now. LOL. When I hear AWAKE, I think of my kids. I know that someday they are going to be away from me and it is hard to think about. They are very special people in my life, and to think of them moving on, just is heart wrenching. They are my babies. But they will someday. I will remember! These are special times............

Thanksgiving is around the corner, and then Christmas. Boy, the seasons are flying right by. Usually I would have my Christmas shopping done by now, but this year, it is happening later than I wanted. I just hate being in stores this time of year. People tend to be quite pushy as they make their way in and out of the crowds. I don't shop on line either. I pretty much stay away from that all together. I personally want to see what I am buying before I do. I don't even have my Christmas cards yet. Whats wrong with me? HAHAHA. I am usually really organized, and have these things done way in advance, but not this year. I have really put things off. *slaps self*naughty me. But, I will have family out here for both joyous occassions, so it kind of is the most important thing about the holidays anyway, so I can't complain too much. The only thing I don't like to do is the cooking...... oh, what a mess that can be. Stressfull too. Speaking of, you should have been here yesterday, as the clouds were dark yesterday too, and I had Pumpkin pie cooking in the oven. The smell of that filled the air, and it reminded me of the upcomming holidays. I also had my Secret Garden music playing, along with a few candles burning........it was a very homey like moment. Yes, I am weird, I know.But that moment totally got me in the mood for holidays. These are special times indeed.......

Well, off to see what other trouble I can get into today. I am quite in the mood to write, so I will probably be back later before the day ends LOL. I know what your thinking, what the heck does a stay at home mom do that is soooo important that she has to write about it in a blog every day? LOL........... HAHAH, I don't know, I guess I am just bored I guess..........LOL....

My tip for today is don't wait til the 24th of December to go Christmas shopping......... yes, I know people that have done that. In my own family no less........... sheesh!

P.s . I hope they fix these boards soon........Kind of a pain to log off here to go somewhere else to ge on the forum........ I hope Wyatt saves the day again..........

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