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Holiday Blues???

jlbrown3711's picture
on November 30, 2006 - 10:08am

Why do people get sad at Christmas? I mean it is understandable if you have lost someone, or strugguling with an illness, or some other kind of problem that seems overwhelming, but can a person be sad just to be sad?I was out shopping with the family last night at the Modesto Mall, and my son starts having a tantrum during and after dinner so I took him and waited in the car while Dad and the girls went shoping. I had the radio on, and I just felt sad. I can't even explain why because I know I am lucky compared to so many, but still, a part of me felt really blue that the holidays were here. No particicular reason why either. I wanted to cry, but I chose not to because I really didn't want to in front of my son. Do you know how hard it is to want to cry but can't? Extremely difficult. All I can say is thank goodness I didn't have Josh playing at the time or I might of let it out anyway. His music tends to hit me at my soft spot and bring those emotions right out. Even during our dinner I kept thinking why am I not happy right now? You would think spending time with the family, and watching the kids light up as they see the mall decorated with all the beautiful colors would have made me smile. But sadly it didn't. Whats worse, is I feel totally guilty for feeling this way because I do know there are people out ther with no homes, or no means of buying their own kids presents, terminal illnesses, etc.... so who am I to feel upset and unhappy right? I spent some time questioning myself for even feeling that. But no matter what I tell myself, or how much reason I put to it, the feelings are still there and they are what they are. Should I just accept them and let myself feel them? Should I keep busy and pretend they aren't there? I am really trying to be happy for the kids, because they need to see it. But I hate just pretending. Mom does need to be happy. How does one regain happiness or take control over it? I know, so many questions. I am sure this moment will pass. It often does. I am not the only one in this world who has ever had the holiday blues. I tell myself that it will be ok, and just believe that things will get better. I have to believe that or I could easily see myself sit through a huge depression. I don't want to let that happen. Feeling sorry for myself is not a fun place to be. I have done before, and do not like the feeling it creates Not much gets accomplished when I allow those feelings to take over me. I want to always try and be positive in everything I do. Somedays it is just harder to achieve that. I suppose thats ok. We all need to feel those days too. It helps us grow. But it is hard when you have to go through them. I just have to find ways to keep myself the happy person I know I am. So thats why I am here.......Its great to be able to let out those thoughts in your mind that keep you from being happy. I hope everyone finds their place that allows them to relive them of the negativity.

Ok, was talking to a fellow Grobanite yesterday about you know who and she had reminded me of a very good point. We were discussing GROBAN ( what else is new ?) and that latley that alot of fans seem to need more and more of him, and his time. I have seen it way too often. He will do something nice for the fans and the next thing we hear is how much we want more of it......The instant gratification is what we were calling it.Seems nothing tides us over for that long sad to say. I am not saying this in a negative way, because I have been there too myself. I think we all have at one point. I know I have not hidden the fact that I have wanted to get a picture with the guy and my attempts or lack of, has really got to me a little at times. But the more I think of it, the more I realize is that there is no way he can make everyone happy. It is nothing personal. So I let that go all together. There will be days when he reaches out to the fans, and then there are days when he doesen't feel up to it, or can't. I think that is pretty understandable, but yet some will get mad if they don't get what they want from him. He is but one person trying to do a job that is quite demanding. I almost feel sorry for the guy. I said ALMOST! HAHAHAH! Can't really get too upset with the Grobanites because there hearts are in the right place. Nothing wrong at all about caring about someone. If anything, the world needs more of it!

Wow, ok, I have gone on and on now. Time to go back to the cards I have been trying to get to, but have been putting off. Naughty me. Hope every one is getting their holiday chores done. Don't wait til the last minute. Anyway, my tip for today is don't sit on a cactus! Need I say more?

"Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky you'll get by

If you Smile through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll see the sun come shining through

For you"....Josh Groban

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