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Sorry about this post

jlbrown3711's picture
on December 16, 2006 - 5:15pm

What a cold, dreary Saturday it is. Ususally I love this weather but I am feeling like nothing can make me happy today. Ever wake up just knowing your day was going to feel like it was out to get you? I woke up as late as I could as my body just seemed really overly tired for some strange reason. Maybe my mind has been working extra hard these days, but when I did finally manage to get up, I just had this feeling come over me like just wanting to be left alone. From everyone. Spouse is home again with his illness driving us all crazy, my kids are home now, and two of them are sick as well. It has been a struggle to keep the house clean and maintain my sanity the last few days. But I try, knowing that I have responsibilities to them and being the grownup I am must face those tasks even if my heart isn't in it. Today it is more than just not wanting to do chores, or even being with anyone. Its just that I am not feeling up for anything. Its times like these I really hate being a woman. Yes people, you know it is bad when I have to blog about "that time" lol. FORGIVE ME! But it really is a sucky time of life for a woman. Men too I think! HAHAHAH. You know, I might have a lot of issues with my own spouse, and believe me, I could write a book, but there are times when I do feel sorry for him. To Be in a house with three other females is probably a very difficult thing to have to deal with. He is so out numbered. LOL. Its not so much the pain of it that is awful, but the emotional roller coaster that really makes a woman feel like not herself. At times, like now, I seem to want to stay the hell away from everyone I know, and just sit in a dark room and just cry til I can't cry any longer. But I can't do that. I have kids to look after. It wouldn't be a good idea to have them see mom act this way. Then there is times I find myself in a car and I hear a song on the radio and all of a sudden, I am fighting back tears not knowing why. I wonder if men ever feel like doing this? Do they have monthly emotional issues? Do they cry when they hear some Red Hot Chili Pepper song? Do they see their teams loose and just break down? Or do they get hostile when they loose the remote control and have to actually walk over to the TV? HAHAHAH! I haven't even been able to get on FOJG the past couple of days either like I normally would. I do miss my friends there, but just don't feel up to talking about anything to anyone. Just even talking about Josh this, Josh that has gotten to me a bit. (to put it mildly). I seriously hate the feeling of not being in control over my feelings.It always leaves me in such an emotional state and I don't like it at all. I suppose I feel sorry for spouse because when he asks me whats wrong, I will just shrug and say I don't know, or sometimes nothing at all..... Women can just be so hard to read at times and sometimes we don't really know whats wrong.All we know is that we don't feel right. And you know we aren't going to say to them that we are acting like this because we are seriously having hormonal issues. No, we are going to say every thing is their fault. Sad, but true. I can admit we are not easiest people in the world at certain times, but when we our ourselves we are great. PLEAE REMEMBER THAT!!! HAHAHAHHA! I know, what a thing to blog about, but such is life. I am a women and human nature has burden me with the Joys of all that being a woman brings. Life itself isn't always fun to talk about, but I think it is necessary that we talk about it anyway. I even debated weather I should write this blog or not, but realized there is more to me then just happy moments. Its also good to express those feelings even when they are brought out by hormonal reasons. * repeats to self, I am human, I am human* I think it is also important that we laugh about it when we can so it does not drive us nuts. Or the men in our lives nuts either. So with that, I say Hugs to all the men who have to deal with women on a regular basis......You are truly brave creatures. Got to love ya for it!

If you actually read this, then brave you are. HAHAHAH. What can I say, I am a true dork and always will be. Anyway, must go relax and forget my stress for the time being. Just know I am not a total monster this time. Just an emotional one.....I will be back to chipper self soon. Maybe! Hugs to those who need one....

My tip for today is give men a break atleast once in a month!!!!!!!!

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