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Feeling tired from it all

jlbrown3711's picture
on November 5, 2007 - 9:32pm

Another long day is finally coming to an end. Have you ever had a day so exhausting where by the end of it , that almost everything makes you end up in tears? It has so been like that for me today. Work was really not so busy, but still worked hard none the less. But have to admit, the exhausting part has been from the little things in my life. Such as the phone company screwing up my bill, or my baby sitter having to take time off, so now I am left wondering who will watch the kids, or even my ex's latest demands. God, just it all hit me today and am feeling like screaming at the world. Can't anything just go easy for me just once? I think about all these little problems I constantly have to face and SHOULD remind myself that life could be worse for me than it is. After all, there are kids in parts of this world who have no home or food and I am complaining over stupid crap. I am human, what else can I say. I need to vent like every one else. I am THANKFUL for what I do have.......

If I could, I would love to take a walk down some forest path and just be at one with the world, and the beauty of it. Looking up at the night time stars and watching them sparkle through out the night. The brightness of the moon would lead me to a hidden shelter where I could just let myself be reminded of who I am and how I fit in with this beautiful world. Would love to escape to a place so hidden from the world and just live a very simple life with just the people I cherish the most in this world. Some days the hectic routines of everyday life just seems so overwhelming and facing anyone can be too hard to bare. I so long for some kind of peace. How great it would be if I could move to some place as breath taking as Montana and live in one of those log homes...... God, how glorious that would be. But reality is what it is........WAHHHHH!!! I am sorry, but California is NOT all that. I may have lived here most of my life, but my heart is definitely some place else. I want OUT of here!

Man, I can tell I am tired tonight. Emotions are very strong in me this evening. I don't even think I could handle a simple Josh song right now. I know I would loose it. His songs always gets to me. But man, imagine sitting in a cozy hidden cottage on a beautiful winter night with the love of your life and you are surrounded by the warmth of each other under a cozy blanket and are enjoying the simple conversations you share with one another. You might even be sipping on some hot chocolate as you listen to some lovely Groban music.......Man, sounds like a wonderful moment. Now theres a way to end a day......Oh well, only in my dreams.......... for the time being......!!!! Well, I can still do Groban anyway...... No , wait...... I didn't mean it THAT way..... get your mind out of the gutter....Sheesh!!!!

Well, wanted to write longer, but am tired and will head off to dreamland. I do want to say how THANKFUL I am to all my wonderful friends who always puts a smile on my face when I need it. It has been the best therapy I could have ever asked for. Just listening to another person can really make a difference..... Love ya all for it. Take care, YOU ARE LOVED! God Bless ya ALL!!!!

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