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1eclaire's picture
on January 6, 2008 - 6:26am

Last night was great! I did manage to lock my keys in the car, though, but that I thought worked out nicely because then he had to drive me home. :P
It turned out his younger brother and sister went as well. His bro is 12, and his sister not much older. I told his younger brother I wanted to keep him and take him home with me. He's the cutest thing ever and a great dancer.

There happened to be another guy from church there, so he asked me to dance once. Then some other guy I've never met before asked me to dance. This guy, an Asian (since I don't know names I have to differentiate somehow) and a white guy had been sitting there watching me, and they continued to just watch me after that. They were only a few feet away so it was rather obvious that they were sitting there talking about me. Unfortunately the only thing I heard was the white guy saying I have a pretty smile. I guess I should just be glad I got a dance out of the one guy, but it's rather frustrating. Guys don't seem to mind taking the risk of not seeing me again. I suppose I wasn't worth it to him to talk to me after we danced. He was hesitant to let go of my hand, and just stood there stammering for a minute, unsure what to do. So I thanked him for the dance and told him I enjoyed it. He thanked me and let go of my hand, so I walked off. Next time I'm just going to stand there and let the guy stammer all he wants until he decides what to next. Maybe I gave him the impression I wasn't interested.

Anywho, I of course enjoyed dancing with the guy who invited me. I'll call him A for short. His problem is he tries to do all these fancy moves with me and expects me to just do them. I don't know what I'm doing! I've not had formal lessons. For awhile I couldn't do the move where the the girl ends up on the guy's right side, and then the left, and then goes back to the right, and then the left. He kept telling me, "right arm on top." He had to tell me so much that eventually he just looked at me a certain way, and I knew what he meant. By the end of the night we had it down :) He said my dancing improved drastically that night, and that all I needed was practice. Not nice to imply my dancing wasn't so hot, but this guy's a hard core dancer so I understand. Yet that's why I enjoy dancing with his brother; you get to do all the moves but with out feeling you have to do everything right all the time. When I mess up with his bro and apologize, his bro says "no, it was my fault." (!) A tells me, "keep your arms stiff when I send you away so I can bring you back in," or "stay close to me."

The most interesting thing about dancing is how relationships play a role. I'm at a point in my life where it's become difficult to trust guys. When you dance, you have to not think about what you're doing but just let them lead. I have a tendency to try to figure out what move the guy is trying to get me to do, and then I screw up. When I relax and just feel the music, the dance is smooth, with out screw-ups. In life and in dancing, I want to know what's going on at every moment.

Getting physically close to someone is difficult for me as well. I don't know why.

Oh, and guess who A played in the car on the way home? 2 songs in a row!! When Si Volvieras a Mi started playing I got excited and exclaimed, "Yay! My favorite!" Then he played Oceano, my absolute favorite song. His sister sang along to both songs, which I found interesting. They didn't know who Josh was back in November. When Oceano started he asked if I'd ever danced to it. He claims it's a great Viennese waltz, though a little fast.

Time to get ready for church. I'm obsessed with last night! And I have so much other stuff I need to talk about. I think might explode. I should bring tissues to church...

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